How I ended up at Motley Crue?!

Heh.

2 months ago, I called up my friend and gave her a choice between seeing two different concerts for her 30th birthday present.

The choices were between Sting (which I was a big Police fan and I have a big soft spot for him), or Motley Crue (which was more her thing when she was a kid.) She chose Motley Crue, so I reluctantly bought the over priced tickets, kind of lamenting the fact that I really wanted to go to Sting - but it was her present.

That was it, for 2 months, I planned to take my friend to Motley Crue. The Sting show came and went. Then the night before the Crue concert, she called and said that she couldn't come! I had gone out of my way to take the next day off so that we could go out afterward. So then, I was stuck with 2 tickets to a show that I didn't want to see in the first place.

My husband said that he would go, so we met up in Grand Rapids, parked the cars and walked to the arena. The line to get in already wrapped around the building!

We hopped in line and just started watching. You can't help but stare; it's amazing the kind of people that a show of this nature pulls out of the woodwork! We saw LOTS of really well manicured mullets (they're kind of like Bonsai Trees, you know?! lots of different shapes and sizes. lol.), A ton of Harley Davidson leather-clad people, the classic big haired groupie types (only now a lot older, with more mature ho outfits) and a lot of people that were there for 2 things "drinkin' beer & kicking ass." heh.

The best part of being in line (and almost the whole night) was an elderly gentleman standing out front playing the most beautiful violin music. He had on a simple sweatshirt and corduroys and had a very old & tattered violin case out in front of him, spread open for donations. Man, if I had the chance, I would have rather given him the money for his show. But anyway.

So, we found our seats and resumed our befuddled people watching. If you like to see boobies, this is the show for you. I don't know what it is about the likes of Nicki Sixx (2 x's, of course) and the boys, but they snake charm the titties right out of their shirts! It's amazing.

The stage was set up like a circus tent; strippers in stilleto platforms were climbing around on poles on either side of the stage. I guess they must have been the monkeys from the circus!?

My husband whipped out 2 packages of ear plugs for us to wear for when the music started. I just laughed and thought "how un-rock-n-roll, man." So, I reluctantly put them in.

People from the local radio station went out on stage to inform us that "out of all the states in America, 'the Crue' picked us 'crazy mutha fuckas' to be in their movie for Showtime." Great, now there is documented proof that I actually went to this show! lol. They spent the next 45 minutes riling up the crowd and taking tapes of our staged screaming of "Crue, crue, crue, crue!" Oh my god, this is a twisted dream, right?

Finally the, lights dimmed. Oh, take a deep breath, it's show time! (insert tongue in cheek here.) They came right off the bat with "Shout at the Devil." Right as they started, we got kicked out of the seats we were in. We had been directed to the wrong section and had to move. So, we were out in the hallways moving around and missed all of that song. We got settled in to our new seats, which were actually closer anyway, and resumed devil horned fist pumping. I have to admit, I sickly enjoyed hearing "Looks that Kill" again. But, the earplugs did nothing but make Vince Neil's singing stand out. I realized how much he sucks. I had to pull them out a little so that he was covered up more by the music!

The concert had a break half way through and we decided that we had seen enough. It was pretty fun, actually. We got out in the hallway and quickly realized that it was jam packed with people. It got harder to move and people started pushing. They were pushing so hard that someone around me kept saying "Don't fall down! Don't fall down!" It was actually kind of like being in the mosh pit at Pantera. (I tried that once for fun. I didn't die. lol.) We eventually got shoved through to a spot by the escalator, so we exited quickly.

We walked briskly away to our cars. I drove away thinking "How many of you mutha fuckas are 'old school' Motley Crue fans?!" "Um, all of them?"